I know it is a bad time for me to be all sentimental and melodramatic this weekend, mainly because I REALLY, SERIOUSLY need to finish working on my darned thesis, but I can’t help it. I guess because the whole I idea of finishing my paper brings be back to the day my world did a complete turnaround and my path with this grieving began, when I lost something I held nearest and dearest to my heart.
It’s been a long time, I know, and since then, many things have changed. It took some time, but I finally was able to make amends with that which caused me such grief. I was able to start taking steps forward. I started to heal from that hurt and for the most part, I guess I was able to look back let go of the bitter pain that left me debilitated for the longest time.
These past few days however, I find myself being sentimental and nostalgic about things and thus it’s been a roller coaster ride for me. I find myself being visited by grief once again.
I guess it’s kinda like what that article I read last night said about grieving. In that article the writer said that having faith that in time, the sharpness of the pain of grief will go away but that despite that dulling, it does not really go away completely. When I was giving that some thought, I realized it is indeed true. The pain isn’t the same, I must admit. The sadness a different tone. But all in all, I really must say, it still exists.